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Funny Quotes About Doctors

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees.

Benjamin Franklin
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I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.

George Carlin
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You need a good bedside manner with doctors or you will get nowhere.

William S. Burroughs
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We may lay down a maxim, that when a nation abounds in physicians it grows thin of people.

Joseph Addison
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The doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months. The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying "Mrs. Cohen, your check came back." Mrs. Cohen answered "So did my arthritis!" The Doctor says "You'll live to be 60!" "I AM 60!" "See, what did I tell you?"

Henny Youngman
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First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.

Steve Martin
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I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.

Henny Youngman
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