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Funny Food Quotes

This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them.

Gracie Allen
food quotes   stupid quotes  
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My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

Phyllis Diller
short quotes   thanksgiving quotes   quotes about kids/childhood   food quotes  
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I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

A. Whitney Brown
short quotes   sarcastic quotes   food quotes   ego quotes  
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I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.

Erma Bombeck
short quotes   thanksgiving quotes   food quotes   family quotes  
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A tip for those who don't like to cook for Thanksgiving: Send a turkey to Boca a few days before so it comes back with a crispy, golden tan.

Joan Rivers (tweet)
Thanksgiving quotes   twitter quotes   food quotes  
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Pepperidge Farm bread...that's fancy bread. You can tell it's fancy because it's wrapped twice. You open it, and it still isn't open. That's why I don't buy it. I don't need another step between me and toast.

Mitch Hedberg
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Food for thought is no substitute for the real thing.

Walt Kelly
short quotes   food quotes  
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