This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them.
Pepperidge Farm bread...that's fancy bread. You can tell it's fancy because it's wrapped twice. You open it, and it still isn't open. That's why I don't buy it. I don't need another step between me and toast.
An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.
Best way to get rid of kitchen odors: Eat out.
Nouvelle Cuisine, roughly translated, means: I can't believe I paid ninety-six dollars and I'm still hungry.
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
Instead of turkey for Thanksgiving I'm serving a bowl full of Cliff bars. Day's about family anyway so anyone who complains is a dick.