When the Wampanoag fed the Pilgrims on Thanksgiving they didn't know they'd just begun Socialism for Illegal Immigrants.
A tip for those who don't like to cook for Thanksgiving: Send a turkey to Boca a few days before so it comes back with a crispy, golden tan.
Instead of turkey for Thanksgiving I'm serving a bowl full of Cliff bars. Day's about family anyway so anyone who complains is a dick.
There is no love sincerer than the love of food.
Pepperidge Farm bread...that's fancy bread. You can tell it's fancy because it's wrapped twice. You open it, and it still isn't open. That's why I don't buy it. I don't need another step between me and toast.
Food is an important part of a balanced diet.
Avoid fruits and nuts. You are what you eat.