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Funny quotes from Mitch Hedberg


I wanted to buy a candle holder, but the store didn't have one. So I got a cake.

Mitch Hedberg
birthday quotes   short quotes  
email quote


A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.

Mitch Hedberg
short quotes   food quotes  
email quote


This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty.

Mitch Hedberg
short quotes   sarcastic quotes   fashion quotes  
email quote


I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down.

Mitch Hedberg
short quotes   sarcastic quotes  
email quote


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